A lot of us have been there: you’re going about your day and suddenly someone says something. It usually hits like an emotional bomb at first before our ears fully process what we’ve heard. Prejudiced comments are unfortunately still a part of our environment.
These situations are difficult to navigate for a reason. No one likes being called out for being prejudiced. And no one likes having to call someone out on their prejudice. The whole situation is just uncomfortable, but we have some ideas for how you can handle these happenings in the workplace.
What Should You Do If Someone Makes A Prejudiced Comment?
The first step is always to acknowledge how the comment made you feel. Those feelings are valid and shouldn’t be ignored. From there, you have a few options.
Don’t Ignore It
It’s tempting to ignore these comments, especially if you deal with them often or if you’ve tried addressing it only to be ignored.
Our society is undergoing a change, and it’s up to us to help everyone navigate these conversations together so we can create a space where everyone feels welcome and safe.
Decide If You Want to Act Directly or Indirectly
You can choose to handle this situation directly or indirectly. If you feel safe and secure, you can confront the person directly. If you feel you need distance from the incident, then you can handle it indirectly.
Some places you can turn to for support are:
Other co-workers, especially anyone present when the comment was made
Your administrative staff
Your human resources department
If your case isn’t heard within the workplace, you can turn to the U.S. Equal Employment Commission for helpful resources and contact information.
Directly
It can be helpful to speak with the person one-on-one. Calling someone out publicly makes them more likely to be reactive instead of receptive. Most people get defensive when they’re called out about a prejudiced remark. When you have the one-on-one, you can:
Repeat their words back to them: Sometimes this is all it takes to get someone to understand how their words might have sounded to a discriminated party.
Explain how it made you feel: Explaining to the other person how their comment landed with you can help them empathize with you. This is the first step in helping them understand and change their behavior.
Discuss intent: What we mean by this is, discuss with them how even though they might not have “meant anything by it” that does not affect its impact. It’s their job in this situation to listen and learn, not excuse their behavior.
Indirectly
There are plenty of reasons you might not feel equipped to deal with the situation directly. This might be because the emotional impact is simply too great, or maybe you simply don’t have the energy to educate someone. Regardless of your reason, there are indirect ways you can deal with the prejudice:
Appeal to authority: One of the most direct-indirect ways to deal with prejudice is to appeal to authority in the workplace. If you’re unsure who to speak with, talk with your direct supervisor. You don’t need to divulge all at this stage. Simply state that you need to speak with someone about workplace prejudice. From there, they can point you in the right direction.
Suggest a training: Discuss with your administrators the possibility of a sensitivity training. These trainings exist for a number of demographics. There are professionals who teach in the workplace specifically to better everyone’s understanding of how they might offend minority groups.
Advocate for Yourself
It is an unfortunate truth that prejudice, microaggressions, and other personal attacks happen far too often in our country. These aggressions are harmful. Your feelings when they happen are valid and deserve attention. If you feel that you’ve suffered emotional or psychological harm due to prejudice, reach out to a therapist.
We can help you navigate the complicated emotions that arise during and after these situations. We can also help you identify your triggers and come up with a plan to accommodate them.